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A “Both/And” Kind of Joy

“In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

1 Thessalonians 5:18

 

Last week, we celebrated Thanksgiving. You know, the holiday that celebrates gratitude, but is shoved in between Halloween and Christmas and barely gets a mention in the stores. In 1 Thessalonians, we receive instruction that gives us a glimpse of what God’s will looks like in our life. Thanksgiving. A life marked by continuous gratitude. That got me thinking about what that looks like practically; how do you truly, in a sincere, undivided kind-of-way, give thanks in everything. You know, the stubbed toe, the broken marriage, the inability to conceive a child, the job loss, getting cut off in traffic…everything. This is a big ask. How is it even possible to do this wholeheartedly?

 

I’ve heard it said that thanksgiving is the antidote to worry, to envy, to bitterness, etc. So I wondered: Is it the antidote to sorrow? Deep sadness can sometimes get in the way of being thankful, but does it have to? Can you be sad and grateful at the same time? Praise God that the scriptures give a resounding YES!

 

 

“Even in laughter the heart may ache, and the end of joy may be grief.”

Proverbs 14:13

 

“The heart knows its own bitterness, and no stranger shares its joy.”

Proverbs 14:10

 

“For my life is spent with sorrow…my strength fails because of my iniquity…Oh, how abundant is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you…”

Psalm 31:10a, b, 19a

 

I’m thankful for these passages of scripture that remind me that grief and joy can coexist. That being grateful in the midst of difficult circumstances does not betray grief.

 

I’m an adoptive mom to two beautiful girls. It has been the biggest blessing of my life. But, adoption did not come with a pretty bow on top. In an ideal world, adoption would not be necessary. It is the best picture to me how something joyous could come from such brokenness. I have struggled with this complexity at times. But in the end, I am reminded that God does his best redemptive work through loss.

 

Likewise, soon we will celebrate Christmas. A time when Jesus, light of the world, was born as a beautiful fulfillment of scripture. Yet, he was born to be broken for us, born to die. Do you ever think of what that must have felt like for Mary?

 

Someone very wise once said that they were thankful for the blessing of suffering because Jesus draws near in times of loss, in times of suffering. We will never feel suffering in heaven. We will be in the presence of the Lord all the time.

 

“The LORD is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit.”

Psalm 34:18

 

I think another reason thanksgiving can be extra challenging at times is that most of us struggle with uncertainty. We want a happy ending, we want answers to our questions that we still don’t have. I was reading this week in Psalm 119 and learned this truth about this famous passage of scripture:

 

“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.”

Psalm 119:105

 

The word for lamp indicates a candle, which only gives just enough light to take the next step. The word for light indicates a brighter, all-encompassing light like sunshine or as in “let there be light.” So, whether it’s wanting answers to take the next step or it’s bringing the sunshine, God’s word is the answer.

 

So what can we practically do when we are struggling to be thankful:

 

1) Spend time in the Word. Soak up His truth and expect to see amazing things. (Psalm 119)


2) Remind ourselves what is pure, lovely, and good about the Lord. (Phil 4:8)


3) Remind yourselves you do not have to be happy about every difficult circumstance to be thankful that the Lord is good.

- God does not willingly afflict. (Lamentations 3:33)

- God is near the brokenhearted. (Psalm 147:3)

- He does not waste anything. (Romans 8:28)

- Even though Jesus was sinless in every way, he came down to become sin so that I could be with Him in eternity and know him on this side of heaven. He sympathizes with my struggle with sin, every sin, and makes it possible for me to draw close to Him and find grace and mercy in my time of need. (Hebrews 4:16)


4) Pray to God for wisdom and answers. He delights to give wisdom to the simple. Can I get a hallelujah?! (James 1:5, Proverbs 1:4)

 

Sisters, I am grateful that God gives us such a beautiful glimpse at what thanksgiving can look like on this side of eternity. We can be sorrowful and thankful at the same time. Through him, we can experience loss but yet have a heart so full of authentic joy.

 

Father, Thank you for being so utterly good. Help our eyes to see, our ears to hear, and our heart to believe that you are the only thing worthy of our praise. Help us to know we don’t have to fight against sorrow to experience a heart of true thanksgiving.



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